creative force

i had written this entry exactly two years ago today on my old blog and i'll repeat it again here. compass life journey was a creative journaling workshop that i attended several years ago with my friend in chicago. we thought it would be a great exercise to get us in shape for writing on our blogs and explore our creativity in a unique way.  we began by receiving a set of questions that was divided into four parts or directions of the compass (north, south, east, west), which became the tool in guiding us through our lives during this workshop. i've always felt that drawing came more naturally to me than writing so i first responded to the questions by picking up a crayon and drawing on my large blank piece of paper.

 

i mostly focused on two directions- south and east because it was the easiest for me to explore. south was the direction that represented sunny exposure, creativity, imagination, spontaneity and play. i began by drawing a tree. there are many references to nature especially trees in my work. when i was faced with a hardship five years ago, i drew in order to cope, and for some reason, i was always drawing trees. as i began to draw more and more of it, it felt like the trees in my drawings grew with me over time and looked stronger as i grew stronger. so on this day, i began by drawing the tree that was so familiar to me because it fostered my love for drawing. it also symbolized growth and hope. then i drew a path towards east, the direction that represented dawn and perspective of new beginnings.  i think my creativity, spontaneity and imagination helped shape my new beginning and direction.  i drew a computer, as i promised myself to write more on my blog and added colors and more references to nature.  when i took a step back and looked at my work, i saw that i wasn't such a dark person.  i'm always striving to find joy in nature, my environment and my artwork.  i love simplicity, but i also noticed that my life was pretty colorful and complex, which was okay.  i cut and pasted a really fun pink skeleton apron and didn't know why at first.  it just made me laugh, but now i realize that i can be fun and quirky... even strange at times.

west had to be the hardest to face as it dealt with the past.  west represented the direction of the setting sun, a perspective that shows where there are endings and where we need to let go.  i drew myself, holding a heart on a string.  one of the questions asked, "where is deep healing needed?"  for me, deep healing is in the heart... to forgive and love myself more.  i also went back to my past to think about the things that i did let go and the good things that came along the way.  my "west" (past, pain) helped shape my "east" (new beginnings) with the help of the "south" (creativity, imagination, fun!).  the directions all related to one another. there were some questions that made me feel hesitant to explore.  i think i still need more time.  as for the direction of north, which represented the perspective needed to keep the other three directions aligned and the compass user on course, was of course, God.  without Him, there wouldn't be any of this. there simply wouldn't be me.

i managed to finish my compass life journey at home. we met a lot of great people on that day and ended up exchanging blog information. the compass journal was a great exercise for self-reflection, and i would love to do it again just to see how my life has evolved over the years.

"to create is to move into the unknown- to move into the mystery of yourself, to have feeling, to awaken buried perceptions, to be alive and free without worrying about the result. but the mind is conditioned to think it wants a nice painting, a nice tree, beautiful scenery. no! maybe you want monsters. maybe you want chaos, maybe you want a mess. maybe it will feel good to paint an ugly painting. maybe that would open your being much more than a masterpiece." -Cassou & Cubley